You Deserve Wellness
The most straightforward task is a challenge for a cluttered mind. Try sitting still in silence and counting backward from 100 to 1. It should take about a minute and a half, but the mind experiences time much slower when stillness is not an established routine. Silently counting is a mindless task unappreciated by the busy mind.
While stress is a normal part of our lives, prolonged stress threatens optimal living. The over-reliance on external stimuli can be a response to emotional stress. Having healthy ways to address stress safeguards us from stress rising to a level of distress.
Emotional distress is the absence of emotional wellness. It is not a total absence but a gap. When the gap becomes wider and wider, distress threatens our everyday functioning, and mental health issues arise.
Facing Stress
Stress is our internal alarm system that is normal in everyday living. The physiological symptoms warn of potential harm. We could fail if we don’t do well on the exam. If we don’t find a job, we won’t be able to pay our bills. Forgetting something important in your relocation process could affect your finances. The physiological indicators of our potential for failure signal us to try our best.
Blood pressure may rise; sleep disruptions may occur along with appetite changes, and you may have a loss of interest in usual activities. Those symptoms allow us to hyper-focus on solving our problems and avoid potential harm.
When these symptoms are prolonged, we will likely develop unhealthy, unconscious patterns to soothe our minds. These patterns include but are not limited to substance abuse, high-conflict communication, low healthy risk-taking, or high unhealthy risk-taking.
When we cannot see our way out of our circumstances, stress is more likely to become emotional distress.
Anyone can manage everyday stress with the right action toward a resolution. We can recover from the threat. However, when we cannot see our way out of our circumstances, stress is more likely to become emotional distress. The death of a loved one has no resolution. Being victimized or traumatized has no explanation. You cannot recover from these stresses. You have to heal them.
Even when we apply stress techniques to distress, we are only coping. Reaching out to friends, staying busy to remain positive, or working out more gets us over our rough patches. But distress is more than a rough patch. You need more than good coping skills. Processing emotions helps you explore the entire context of your circumstance.
For example, grief from a loved one’s death is usually about more than the person’s absence in your life. To heal the suffering, the person may need to address their fear of living alone. Their fear of living alone may stem from the childhood harm. Childhood harm may have been unresolved. The loss of the person represents something much more profound.
High-Quality Wellness
Some people over the age of fifty are content if they can live without taking any prescriptions. However, some people cannot walk more than a block without discomfort. That is not my idea of wellness. Wellness is not just about what goes into your body. It’s about what your body can produce.
Living with asthma doesn’t prevent me from enjoying 5-mile runs several times a week or going to the gym at 5:00 am on weekdays. My 60-year-old body outperforms many 28-year-old bodies in areas of endurance and strength. Yet, they have many more years to live than I do and can alter their physical circumstance with relative ease if they choose.
Likewise, mental wellness is not an all-or-nothing outcome or a continuum. Wellness is a complex favorable negotiation between your internal and external environments. It takes into consideration the inner experience of the mind and spirit as well as the external conditions.
Wellness is a complex favorable negotiation between your internal and external environment.
An overemphasis on markers of external success is an obstacle to wellness. Wealthy and successful people who take their own lives, end up in addiction rehab, or are diagnosed with severe mental health issues remind us of the importance of attending to internal wellness.
Inside Out
An overemphasis on markers of inner success is an obstacle to wellness too. People who rely on reality TV for happiness instead of manifesting their own may feel quite content. However, they never reach their potential.
Although we cannot see what our mind is doing with our eyes, we can make assumptions about our mind’s wellness based on mental performance. No matter how well your performance may be, you can pay attention to your mental health if you have difficulty in the following areas. Significant wellness traits include mental flexibility, a focus on the present, cognitive predictability, emotional independence, and truthful living.
These wellness traits support a healthy balance of internal and external fulfillment. Mental flexibility is the ability to thrive in more than one environment, especially in unfamiliar territory. Focusing on the present minimizes conflict; cognitive predictability allows you to manifest your desires; independence enables you to self-soothe; living frees you from living in fear.
Significant wellness traits include mental flexibility, a focus on the present, cognitive predictability, emotional independence, and truthful living.
These traits are intertwined. The absence or presence of these traits varies within each person, as life is complicated. The point is not to evaluate yourself on these traits because having them when you need them is most important. If you measure your wealth on payday, your finances look good. However, your bank account tells a different story five days later when all your bills are due.
However, when you are experiencing prolonged stress, considering the presence of these traits can be helpful. Constant failure is a reason to consider if you need to build these traits. For example, if you continuously focus on past or future experiences to avoid risks, you will be limited in your ability to manifest your desires.
The Heavy Mind
Emotional distress means the mind is heavy. If you try to do the exercise of counting backward, you are likely to lose focus. When adversity comes, you are likely to lose control. If you have to change your life direction, you are likely to get lost.
A heavy mind has little flexibility. It doesn’t move with ease. Some minds are so heavy that an added feather will send them crumbling, metaphorically speaking. Every ask sounds monumental. Carrying a heavy mind is like walking around with your hands full. You are limited in your ability to navigate your environment. You cannot adequately give or receive with your hands full. Instead, you are usually looking for someone or something to help you unload.
The Journey of Wellness
Wellness is not about being happy or sad at any given moment. The world of wellness can accommodate all feelings. Loss provokes grief; success brings joy, and unplanned change bears mental exhaustion. Current feelings are not reliable markers of mental health.
Not only can wellness include all emotions, but we can also experience various emotions simultaneously. Unplanned changes can cause mental exhaustion and elicit joy simultaneously, such as being promoted to a position that requires relocation.
Wellness is a conscious commitment to living your best life.
Emotional wellness is about endurance. What feelings dominate in the absence of stimuli? Emotional health means sleep comes easy most nights, and the morning greets you with inspiration most of the time. You get through most days without conflict. You work with enough focus to get done the things you plan.
Wellness is a conscious commitment to living your best life. You attempt to become your best self and live your best life. That life may include the help of a professional to help you relieve distress. Relieving distress may require life changes that initially create more stress. You have to understand you are restructuring for the long-term advantages of living without distress.
